I EXIST

Came in to sub and the receptionist said there was coffee and donuts in the teacher’s lounge. I went to indulge. In doing so another sub comes in from the same company I work for (we have matching lanyards) and I promptly told him about the free donuts. He responded in a sense that suggested he didn’t like donuts, to which I responded, “Who ARE you?” in a friendly, welcoming, nice-to-meet-you tone. Then HE responded, “It’s more for health reasons” to which I responded, “Oh so you think you’re better than me?!?” because I generally feel way to comfortable around people way to soon. Even so, that was the end of it, can’t remember how it fizzled out after that, but it did. Then… THEN… during lunch I’m sitting at the back table, alone, and he comes and sits next to me. Never looks me in the eye. Not even as he’s taking his seat to say “Hello person I’m sitting directly next to.” Stuck on his phone the whole time. For like a half hour. Doesn’t look at me once. What a dick. Right?!? Yeah.. .YEAH.. yeah.. WHO’S WITH ME!? WHO’S COMIN WITH ME?!?! CHAAAARGE!!! I’m fine.

Larger-than-average-size fish in pretty-average -size pond

Eating breakfast at a local restaurant in my hometown of Vallejo yesterday. Someone walks past the table and says, “Matt?” I look up. “Matt Larson?” Yeah…? “You do the comedy shows! I’ve been to a few of them. Thanks so much for bringing good shows to town. I’ve also been reading your restaurant reviews every Thursday.” Hey! Yeah! Thanks! Working on one right now! Hahha. We laugh, life goes on—THEN, after the moment passed, he comes back later with two mimosas, one for me and mum, and says “I finally saw your COIT commercial too!” Wow! Thanks! And I didn’t even recognize the guy. It was the most famous I’ve ever felt. And now? Now I’m back in LA…unknown….and all alone……